You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Randomize
