she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
home. puking in laundry basket.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
