Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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