help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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