He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
