Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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