I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize