Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize