I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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