your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
