What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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