ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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