This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Randomize
