I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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