He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
