I murdered the dance floor call the cops
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize