Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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