No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
His hands were made for my vagina.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
