The brown eye won't let me do that either.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize