What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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