marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Randomize
