I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
that is very illegal...i love you.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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