Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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