It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
