So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
