I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
