You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
