Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
We just shotgunned beers for America
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I currently don't understand fingers.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
