Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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