Nicole vs. Life
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
