Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I think my vagina is haunted
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I need moral support for this bender
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
