His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
