did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
