Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize