fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
