should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
