Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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