Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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