Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
A+ Viking dick
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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