As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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