3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just took my morning after pill in the library
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Randomize
