If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
