Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
