I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize