I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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