...so i touched it.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
