oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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