GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize