If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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