i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
one two three fourrrrnication!
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
