Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Pants are for mortals
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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